


Literal TEW

by DustToDust



Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2014-11-26
Packaged: 2018-02-27 03:34:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2677511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustToDust/pseuds/DustToDust
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is nothing new here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Literal TEW

**Author's Note:**

> 4AM bad ideas that made me giggle like a loon as I wrote it. I find it funny-ish. Not as much as I did while I was sleep deprived though. Also, a little more meta than literal than I planned.

"Police call codes that can be found in the first link on Google," the calm voice of dispatch calls over the radio. Staticky as they pass Lawson which always does a number on signal. "No one will understand it or care but it sounds nice and urgent. It also makes no sense when you find out what it means and put it up against what I will say later."

Connelly snaps up the radio mike, foot already pressing down slightly more on the gas pedal as he responds, "Accepting orders by spitting out more short hand than I need to in order to get my point across. Also because it sounds cool."

"Brief acknowledgement," dispatch breaks off with a note of finality in her voice.

"Introduction of the other three in the car by rank alone and setup for the opening scene," Connelly says as he flips on the patrol lights and floors it.

"Concern in a steady voice with a prod for more information," Joseph leans forward enough in the back seat to get a look at Connelly's face.

"Exposition," Connelly glances up in the rearview mirror at the two in the back. "Bare bone facts to lay out more story."

The radio crackles, "Setting up a slow foreboding by calling out for specific units."

Connelly grins a little as he fixes a look on Joseph. "Joking red herring of something horrible to set the mood for the next scene. Also, may or may not be important later on depending on your interpretation of the script."

"Refutation of your ridiculous story with simple facts. Ending with a question that seems to contradict the fact that I know anything about it," Joseph taps his notebook against one gloved hand. "It makes me look intelligent and slightly awkward."

"Throwaway line while the camera pans to show off the pretty ones in the back seat."

"Continued roll call with a little increase in urgency," the radio calls out.

"Slipping the first confirmed name into the game casually," Sebastian twists to look back at Joseph. "And to point out that I rely on you for the intel because you're smart looking and bookish."

"I'm saying something vaguely in a way that makes it seem like we have some information when in fact I'm saying there's no way any of us do," Joseph holds his notebook up and shakes it. "Even though sealing records isn't something that's supposed to happen in a criminal case unless a juvenile or endangered witness is involved, and then it's usually just their name that gets redacted from the report that is filed. Plus those sealings usually only happen after a case is taken to court."

"Speaking louder to bring to light the fact that the multiple police officers on scene aren't responding," the dispatch blares out along the radio.

Sebastian snags the mike up, "Give me more exposition as I lay my name out over the radio for introduction purposes even though I should have a call sign myself."

"Let me lay out the most disturbing pieces for you," dispatch reports immediately. Static creeps in as interference builds and her voice starts breaking up badly. "Not that... knowing the.... name of the place.... will do you any good."

"Sentence that will not be finished-" Sebastian starts as a high pitched feedback whine comes from the radio. Filling the car with a noise that seems to pierce through their ears. "Curse word one!"

Joseph groans in the back and reaches for his ears as Kidman sits with her arms crossed seemingly unaffected.

Connelly jerks one hand off the wheel to slap to his ear. The car slides a little in the rain and he has to correct it fast even though they're the only ones on the road. "Expletive!"

Light passes over the squad car from a lighthouse as Sebastian looks at his partners again in the rear view mirror. Joseph's glasses are off and he's shaking his head hard. Kidman looks completely unconcerned when he addresses her. "Establishing your junior rank and giving you a name in one sentence as I ask for your opinion."

"Mysterious answer to establish there's more to me than you think if you're observant," Kidman says as she meets his eyes, tone dismissive. "It'll also make you jump up and down screaming 'I knew it!' when you play NG+."

Connelly maneuvers the car around several barriers already in place on the street just outside the gates of the hospital before stopping. Red and blue lights flash from inside the gate but there's no noise, no one there to greet them when they step out. Sebastian steps out into the rain and fails to see any movement at all from the other side of the gate.

Joseph approaches from behind, "You've had half a second longer to stare at the scene than me. Does that half second give you any more idea of what's going on than I have?"

"Ignoring your question and naming the driver last to instruct him to tell dispatch we have no idea what's going on," Sebastian says before turning back to the gates and starting towards them. "Statement of the obvious fact we're going to have to look around to figure this out because we're detectives."

"Unneeded acknowledgment to either get my pretty face in the camera or a pan at the disgruntled look on Connelly's face," Kidman acknowledges as she follows behind Sebastian and Joseph.

Squad cars and an ambulance are parked in the circle in front of the massive building that's the hospital. Doors open and lights still flashing but no one in sight. Sebastian walks through the cars and the barriers with police crime tape laced through it to the closed front doors.

"Statement of fact to build more tension," Joseph says after looking into one of the many abandoned squad cars.

"I might or might not say anything as I take the other side of the circle," Kidman mutters. "But no one follows me to find out, they'd all rather follow Joseph's pretty rear."

Sebastian walks cautiously up to the door and slowly pushes the door open before recoiling with a grunt.

Joseph comes up behind him and lets out a loud and obvious sniff. "Morbid statement that means I can identify blood by scent. Which means I either spent a lot of time in another department that involved way more death than the missing person’s branch or I have a lot of women in my family."

Joseph pulls out his gun and pushes the other side of the door open. Weapon up and scanning as he slowly enters looking for danger.

"Warning for Joseph," Sebastian turns to Kidman who is right behind them. "Setting you up as door babysitter which can be seen as either sexist or me using the rookie for grunt work until that NG+ when it's known I never really trusted you that much."

"Protest as expected," Kidman puts in as she places her hands on her hips.

"Not just a no, but a hell no. Also some reasoning to placate you that is actually sound but still sounds condescending," Sebastian steps forward and lets the doors close behind them as he follows Joseph.

The lobby is a blood bath. Joseph walks through clearing the area and trying not to step in the blood from the dead patients and staff. It's an impossible task. Sebastian follows and notes the crime scene tape on one set of doors to the left. It makes no sense being there as the crime scene is in front of them. 

Joseph's low voice echoes in the quite room when he reaches the back where the front desk is laid out. "Rhetorical question to let you know I heard something," he runs ahead to a room on the left and Sebastian follows when he hears his next words. "Alerting you that the next part of the game is in here."

There's a man in a lab coat sitting on the floor just inside the door. Joseph stands over him with his gun pointed away as Sebastian kneels next to the man. "Obvious questions, give me more exposition now that the bloody creepy mood has been set."

"Vague muttering... frustrating your quest for info... and a name drop right here," the doctor says in a halting voice before his eyes roll up and he starts to fall forward.

Joseph drops to his knees and pushes the man up to the wall to keep him from falling. "You could have done this but there are security cameras over there, and you need to watch them to further the storyline."

Sebastian walks over to the lit screens and watches as three cops run on screen in one of them. They all stop and start shooting at someone back the way they came. A man shows up on screen and the first man goes down dead. Before the other two can respond he's moving for them. Too quick to be right as he stabs them both.

"Curse word two," Sebastian mutters as he leans closer to the screen to watch. The man looks up directly at the camera and through the grainy feedback massive scars along his face and neck can be seen. The screen flickers and the man disappears as suddenly as he appeared. "Confused noise that happens to be a word."

Sebastian turns and the man is there, right behind him. He gets a glimpse of his eyes before something gleaming comes down and the world goes white.


End file.
